It all comes back to Family...

I've strayed from writing recently because I've been at a loss of words... and tonight, because of my cousin and best friend, I have been inspired to get some things off my mind. Things I've been wanting to say for some time now.

Family. Love. Sacrifice.

Ultimately in life, family is the only thing that remains constant for most. They are the people that support you when you need it most and are the people that will be brutally honest if they think you are making a huge mistake, even though their intentions are pure. Family is the people that are always there for you when you need them, whether it's for sharing good news and celebrating or if it's to help you pick up the pieces after mistakes have been made.

Sometimes you have to sacrifice things for love, for your family. You have to bear the weight of hard decisions for someone else's happiness and believe me, it can take it's toll. But I've found that in the end, it's usually all worth it and it finds a way to work itself out. You worry about things that matter and things that don't, just because you care.

I've had my share of good family members, the ones who are always around when I need a helping hand or just someone to chat with about life. But on the other side, I've had my share of family members who have turned their backs on me in times when I really needed them to just understand where my feelings were coming from or who have just cut off all forms of communication with me for some unknown reason. Unknown to me, at least.

Don't get me wrong, I'm a Christian and I'm also a praying person, but that doesn't stop me from having doubts about trusting family. I've been hurt many times by people very close to me and I'm sure that it could happen again if I allowed them to get close enough. I have had my guard up for a long time now... and it will remain up because I won't allow myself to feel that way again.

Vulnerable, lost, alone.

In my life, it always comes back to family. It always has.

Family means the world to me... but only true family are the ones that are there for me when I need them most. True family know when I'm hurting before I can tell them that I need a hug. True family comes over with a bottle of wine after hearing I've had a crappy day. True family calls on birthdays and holidays just to remind me that they are thinking about me. True family don't have to ask me how things are going because they already know... because we talk often.



I apologize if this post has seemed a little scatter-brained, but it's getting late and I am literally days away from adding the newest member to our little family. Forgive me! (: